Acceptance – The Key to Managing and Leading People
Too often business managers and leaders look to workplace programs to create healthy and productive employees. The great ones know something that is foundational and more natural. You can’t build a dynamic employee culture unless you ACCEPT people. So easy to say, but what does it mean?
Great leaders and managers appreciate people and accept that they are human: that they can be irrational and emotional. People aren’t machines and don’t work like them. They don’t just do the assignment as it is asked and sometimes they like to do things their own way. It is almost impossible to lead people if you don’t like them and the way they operate.
Employees read acceptance from their leaders. They look to the smile on your face when you interact with them. The smile conveys that they are appreciated and that they matter to you. The absence of some form of positive affirmation can easily be read as rejection, disinterest, or bad intent. This is what makes the ‘meet and greet’ aspect of leadership so important.
Expressing an interest in employees, both professionally and personally, conveys that you care. People always light up when someone higher up asks them about their job. The simplest question, like, “how is it going?” can really make someone’s day. The sense is that they matter if the boss asks. And if they matter, then they are more likely to give a damn about the work and the company.
A critical piece to the process is that people believe they are wanted, and that they are not being rejected. Fears of rejection haunt even the most stable and solid personalities. Peoples’ brains are wired to look for rejection since avoiding it (developmentally) was a survival skill.
Personal affirmations are incredibly powerful. People remember if their boss noticed and mentioned something they did well. It builds connection and loyalty to the mission.
Remember, as a leader, you want to leave nothing about acceptance/rejection to the imagination of the employee. Some are too prone to expecting rejection or disapproval. You must counter this actively through your interaction (and workplace programs) to build a solid foundation of trust and good will.
People ultimately work for you, not just the mission of the organization. Your personal acceptance makes all the difference.
Tom DeMaio, PhD